4 Ways to the Art of Letting Go

As a mindfulness, yoga, Qi Gong, and 'being a good person' student for life, the one super power I’m still cultivating is the Art of Letting Go. My first Qi Gong teacher in southern China would put me in a form/pose and make me hold it for 45 minutes for the first few months of my training. Armed with various mixed martial arts (MMA) black belts, trophies, and knowledge I was ready for the next level of training - to learn how to fly, walk on water, and fight like my first husband, Bruce Lee. To my disappointment, none of that ever happened. Instead, I was tethered to frustration along with many unwholesome thoughts about the teacher and the training.

But…….. I kept going because I was curious.  

I later learned many valuable lessons from those first few months, more so than the Qi Gong forms, philosophy and knowledge I have been accumulating over the years. One of which is to cultivate patience and focus on the practice, rather than comparing it to what I was familiar with or what I was expecting the outcome of each class to be. This was the doorway to my life’s practice of letting go. Back then, I had to let go of my previous MMA knowledge and ego. Since then I have applied that experience to the art letting go in life as well. It’s an art form that requires regular practice.

Here are four things I continue to practice daily to support me in letting go:

1. Focus on the journey and not the outcome.

When I focus on the journey, whether the experience is pleasant or unpleasant, I have better control of how I want my next steps to be. And, I get to live life and not miss out on the moments that I can never get back.

2. Embrace change.

Have you heard of COVID? :-) That’s a change that we need to flow with. “COVID is a fierce teacher” as one of my favourite mindfulness teachers, Thay Phap Hai, says. Fighting change has made me suffer a lot. Instead, I become water and go with the flow.

3. Move away from money, power, fame, sensual pleasure, and external beauty.

Our mindfulness teacher, Thich Nhat Hanh, often reminds us that these are all unwholesome volitions. I have experienced them myself when I was in the corporate world. Chasing after these things have made me suffer a great deal. Sarah and I often remind ourselves to stop comparing ourselves to others, not run after fame as we keep our ego in check, and accept that the money we make is enough to live simply and joyfully in the present moment.

4. When we let go, we also let come.

When we no longer hold on to unnecessary weight, we make space for more beautiful things in life, like time with our beloved baby Emma, the ocean, good friends, yoga, mindful cleaning, etc. I’ve learned to let go of many people, situations, events, and things from my life that no longer serve me. Of course, this is easier said then done. And thus, the need to keep on practicing mindfulness in order to nourish our seeds of understanding, strength, and capacity to let go.

What is it that you need to let go of today?

Feeling a bit lighter every day from letting go,
Hang